Friday, March 31, 2006

Breakin 2 electric Boogaloo

I am seriously in need of a break. I would like a couch, a pillow, perhaps some sort of iced beverage...and a nap.

I'm feeling a little run down. Mind you...I've done nothing more than sit, write, type, talk, print, walk and read.

I would be the worst marathon runner of all time.

I'm made for car rides, changes in scenery, conversations, dreaming, creating and vision casting.

I'm not made for five wheeled office chairs, gray desks, filling in templates, cutting and pasting, forms, and drudgery.

It's just not my bag.

I need a break.

A break is my water in the dessert of climate controlled, brown, apolstered walls...

It's the helium in my otherwise boring, white, latex baloon day...

It's the hashbrowns of my 2 egg breakfast special...

I guess you get the point...I could use some away time...


If I need a sandwich...I go to Quiznos.

If I need a sandwich, some socks and duct tape...I go to Wal-Mart.

Quiznos has better sandwiches, but no socks or duct tape. So the big question is - do I go and get a great sandwich at a quality restaurant that specializes in delicious goodness....or go to the big store on the corner that sells everything?

Convenience or quality?

Delicious or cheap? Which is better?

You could make the argument that a place that specializes in just a few products is bound to have better stuff...but the place that sells everything gives you more variety and better prices.

People vote with their feet...and Wal-Mart is winning.

So is the mega theater that has 24 theaters better than the little theater - in the bad part of town - and only shows the movies that nobody watches - but wins all the awards?

Is the church that has 3,000 programs better than the ministry that has a laser focus on a small segment of our population? We have ministry to the poor, the rich, the young, the old, the disabled, abled, single, married, divorced.... we cover a lot (but not all) So is that better than taking one group and devoting all their time and energy to help one group out?

Can you have convenience, quality and variety?

What do you think?

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I wonder...

Sometimes I wonder why some people like grapes and some people don't...

I wonder why some people not only don't hate cats....but go out of their way to house, feed and care for them

I wonder why Griffin asks me the same question 7 times, fully expecting a different answer on the 7th try

I wonder if Dr. Pepper was an MD or a PHD...

I wonder why they took Ed off the air

I wonder why people high five

I wonder what we should name child #3 (girl)

I wonder why I think about things that I can't possibly influence

I wonder why there are 66 books in the Bible and not a 67th entitled "things you'll want to know in a few thousand years"

I wonder if Dave Wolfenberger dances when he sings at home

I wonder why my lawn is so sparse

I wonder why I use word like "sparse"

I wonder why Fuller doesn't write books

I wonder why clowns freak me out

I wonder why people pay to see Riverdance

I wonder why the Steelers have only won 5 Super Bowls

I wonder why more people don't go by the nickname "Buck" any more

I wonder why people get so mad when I write anything with the Steelers in it

I just wonder...that's all...


seems like an arrogant name..."we're progressive"

"we have evolved"

"we're smarter than people who don't think like us...we don't like those who have closed minds...who don't think like us....we're not like the people who try and impose their values and opinions on everyone else...we're better than those who don't think like us....we celebrate diversity and you'd better do the same thing"

I get that republicans don't have all the answers...neither do democrats, the seven people in the green party, the ACLU, NRA, UN or the NBA....I just worry when one party takes on the mantle of "we've evolved...we're better than you...we think on a higher level...we've progressed..."

We're just trying to make progress, is that so bad?

No - just go do it...stop telling everyone else that they both, have to think like you, and have to have an open mind....pick one and go with it.


Tuesday, March 28, 2006

lunch anyone?

I'm so tired of the same old questions....

if you had three wishes?

what super power?

if you could have dinner with any three people...

so I'm going with a different one today:

If you could have lunch with any four people, who would you invite?

the big one

I met face to face with arrogance the other day.

I was amazed by how full of himself this guy was. I have a sneaking suspicion that it's born out of insecurity...he was beat up as a kid, could never get the girl, was picked last in sports.

The end result is just socially awkwardness masked as calm, cool, control. I wanted to say, "I get it. You make a lot of money. Nice.... You have thoughts, ideas and an agenda...but you're really not that smart. It's o.k. You're pretty smart. You're just not that amazing. We're all going to work together. If your idea isn't the one we go'll be all right.

C.S. Lewis wrote a great chapter about this very subject. He likens pride to "the great sin"

"...I pointed out a moment ago that the more pride one had, the more one disliked pride in others. In fact, if you want to find out how proud you are the easiest way is to ask yourself, “How much do I dislike it when other people snub me, or refuse to take any notice of me, or shove their oar in, or patronise me, or show off?” The point is that each person’s pride is in competition with every one else’s pride. It is because I wanted to be the big noise at the party that I am so annoyed at someone else being the big noise." - C.S. LEWIS

is he talking about me?
what's that all about?

maybe that's something I need to think about...

Monday, March 27, 2006

The pretentious poetry of a third grader

Ode to scotch tape dispenser

Dispense to us your tape
…that has nothing to do with scotch
Glue’s sticky friend
Fix the things that we botch

We love you during the holidays
…yet ignore you in January
Transparent – yes
And yet… still extraordinary

Scotch tape dispenser
You keep us all intact
Help us with our mistakes
And the things in which we lack

the 7 years of being hitched

7 years ago I stood up at the First Presbyterian church, in a tuxedo that many people had rented before me, and stood across from the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen. Rings were exchanged, words said, vows taken...and then we were married.

Just like that. March 27th 1999

I've since checked and that wasn't the first Presbyterian church at all...they've had those for years.

The minister had performed hundreds and hundreds of weddings. There wasn't anything all that unique about the ceremony....but for us - this was monumental.

It changed out lives. Because of this day...
-we now live in the dub C together

-we have two sons and a daughter that wouldn't be around otherwise

-I occasionally drive around a miniature van

-I'm familiar with Wooster and Mt. Vernon, Ohio

-Annie's familiar with sarcasm and passive aggressiveness

-Margaret Mary has a new favorite Murphy

-I get to laugh a lot

-Annie's given up on ever having a pet dog

-I still don't even marginally understand women

-we now look for "couples friends"

-There are 3 more Murphy's in the world (and one on the way)

and I'm a better man...I love my wife

Friday, March 24, 2006

Rockin' the Hall!

There's a national conference happening today. It's happening right here. I get to lead a couple of workshops... sounds sort of important, doesn't it?

The thing is - I've played cards with more people at once than will most likely be in my little seminar/break out session/workshop/whatever we're calling them these days...

So I didn't memorize the Pentateuch. I didn't spend three weeks editing video and putting together power point slides. At no point will I use a pointer. I'm just talking about a few things that I get excited about. That's all. No big whoop...

Here's the problem - They're taping it.


"yeah, we're taping all of the sessions"

"even mine?"



"so people can order them if they weren't here...or want a copy of the ones they missed"



"well crap, I'd better put some effort into this thing. Where is my workshop going to be held anyhow?"

"In west"


"yeah, the west hallway"

"screw it"

Thursday, March 23, 2006


I came home last night to a 5 year old with a 103.8 temperature. Annie had just given him some Tylenol, he was lying down with a wet towel on his head, and he just looked sad.

There's always a panic with a sick kid, but it gets heightened when you also have a pregnant wife and a baby around. So we call the doctor. They call us back. At that point his temperature is down to 101, but they say we should take him into the emergency room to make sure he's not dehydrated.

So....Annie wants to take him and I want to take him. She really needs to be there...and I stay home with Coop. She arrives just behind two ambulances. Usually that means you won't be first. They were there awhile. Eventually they see Grif...and his temperature is down to 98.8.

"so you brought him in because his temperature was .2 degrees high?"

"no, you should have seen him earlier...."

turns out he has strep throat. I think that means I have strep throat and just don't know it yet. You can get contaminated by close contact, and I was thinking as I was lifting him out of his soaking wet bed (because he threw up and didn't have the energy to get out of it) and was carrying him to the bathroom, "I think this is close contact"

please pray for Grif...and Annie, Coop and the baby

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

movin on...

I wonder what's so attractive about the next thing?

I know that my neighbor's grass is always greener - but that wouldn't be very hard with my lawn.

I had calls about two jobs a few weeks ago. It's not that job openings are that rare - it's just that I was called by four different people about two specific jobs that they thought I should take. Three friends, that know me better than most, called me about one job that a few years ago I would have considered a dream job. There are one or two things I sort of know, or don't completely fail in...and those areas of mediocrity were key components of these jobs. I have a very small bit of a reputation in these fields and wouldn't have to work that hard to earn the right to be heard. I could take immediate risks because of this. I'd have a little more room to fail because of this.
It's pretty attractive to think about.

The grass out there is pretty green.
I should mention that I'm not applying for or pursuing either of these possibilities. I just have some guys that periodically call me and tell me to take them. "Get behind me Santa!" I always know because Santa is always trying to get you to take things...

My point isn't the's the possibility of something new.

I get excited when I get something new that will help me get more organized, or in better shape, or learn something. It's almost like I'm buying organization, good health or knowledge. The problem is that I often leave the gizmo or book on a shelf somewhere. The initial excitement of possibility is often more important than the mundane task of incorporating the object, discipline or information into my life.

Do you have any unopened or unused objects, clothes, books or gizmos in your house?

Do you remember when you just had to have them? Did you have a moment where you were sure that whatever it was going to help?

So who cares about job possibilities? Who cares about the next greatest thing to come out to make your life simpler, more efficient, and better?

Wouldn't it be great to just concentrate on where you are and what you've been given?

Maybe I could work on my lawn today...and try to get it a little greener...

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

read all about it!

Do people still read newspapers? I know they buy them. I have a couple of friends who deliver them...but read them?

We buy them occasionally when they're running some sort of Sunday only, 12 week special. We just figure that we'll more than pay for the paper if we use the coupons.
That's a big if...

But everything I could read in the paper is also on the internet, radio and tv. (all free ifyou get your neighbor's wireless internet signal)

I guess it's nice to have everything in one big, finger staining, awkward folding, rain absorbing, walk out to the curb in my bare feet at 6 in the morning - inducing, chunk.

When did the USA Today move up to 75 cents, anyway?

Everything I'd read in the paper can be contained on and yahoo news.

I thought this would be a great plot point for an episode of Ed.

A guy walks into Ed's bowling alley/law office and wants to sue the local newspaper.

Ed: Why would you want to sue the Stuckeyville Bugle?

Mr. Grable: Because they keep delivering their paper to my house.

Ed: I'm sorry. I just don't see much of a case here.

Phil Stubs sticks his head into the office: Hey boss, the hotdog machine is acting up again.

Ed: the (does a double take to Phil) we have a hotdog machine? Hold on Phil....(back to the guy) now what is the nature of this lawsuit?

Mr. Grable: You see Ed, I cancelled my subscription to the paper three months ago...but they keep sending it.

Ed: And they keep charging you?

Mr. Grable: Nope

Ed: so you're going to sue them for giving you free papers?

Mr. Grable: No, I'm suing them for getting my house broken into.

Ed: I'm not sure I follow

Mr. Grable: You see, my wife and I went out of town two weeks ago..and when we came home, the house had been broken into and there were 9 newspapers stacked up on our porch. The robbers knew we weren't home because of all the papers. It was like sticking a Vacant sign on the door.

Ed: I think we have a case Mr. Grable


I just need to include a $10 bet...and then get Letterman to bring Ed back to CBS.

Monday, March 20, 2006

name tags for everyone!

Lighthouses are a symbol of safety. Olives represent martinis (to me at least) and Teddy Bears are a picture of childhood innocence.

Icon's are interesting. I sat through a class once that talked about memory. Turns out that we all remember things as pictures. If you try to remember the word ketchup - you'll picture a bottle of ketchup. When you think of a chair, you visualize some sort of chair (I think of my new massage chair with built in heater - jealous - you should be...until Grif finally breaks it)

I've sat through classes, read books, listened to books and lectures on tape... all so that I could develop a better memory. I meet a few dozen people every week. Usually one or two a day, and then there's always a few meetings where I'll meet a bunch of people at once. You'd think that if I took all these classes and read all these books that I'd be able to remember at least one name a week.
You'd be wrong.

I don't.

I make Annie, Grif and Coop wear nametags.

I constantly refer to myself as Sean Michael Murphy so I'll keep all of my names out there and not forget one.

I've learned to call people dog, chief, cap'n, dude, man, friend, sis, el conquistador and your royal highness - so I don't have to admit that I don't know their names.

Is that bad?

I think so. People love their names...they look your way when they hear them. They know that you know them when you use their names.

Maybe it's my A.D.D. and it's just too hard for me to concentrate on someone's name while I'm thinking about what the difference between jelly and jam is???

I wish you could upgrade your memory at Best Buy. I'd sell my foosball tables for something like that...

Friday, March 17, 2006


The name "Cornhole" still seems a little too naughty to me. I call the game beans - that's just how I roll.

Having said that - I love it. We had two sets in our yard in State College (I still think that's the goofiest name of a city that I'll ever live in...and I lived in Blue Ball for a few years)

You'd think that I'd be pretty good. Not so much. Charlie Matthews and I teamed up to finish third or fourth in our office cornhole tournament (your tithe dollars at work) We made it to the final four and then were whipped out...and by an IT guy partnered with an artist guy - how is that even possible?

Charlie was lights out. He hit the board every time. Me, not as much. I was a little more creative about where I'd throw my bean bags.

I will take credit for our team name "Stop asking us out, we're married" I also named another team "the Cher Holders" (kind of an inside thing)

I also had some backup names:

-The corn dawgs

-Don't ask, don't tell

-The Bob Saget Fan Club

-artificial insemination

-Genesis 27:11

-We were never here

-Charlie and the Vanilla Factory

-No Soup for you

-CrossRoads Community Church

-Small things thrown with great love

-Jesus love us....more

-The fifth spiritual law

I need to spend more time practicing and less time writing team names...

Thursday, March 16, 2006

dreaming of a postmodern, emergent, hippie blog...

I've always wanted to write a trippy, postmodern, emergent-like blog.
Here is my attempt dude...

Come to me my babies
and I will feel your pain
but not your heart
for only a heart surgeon
or a kung fu artist
can truly feel your pain...
My Virtual Cafe:
conversation between a butcher and a baker
Butcher: Hey have you seen the other guy?
Baker: You mean the candlestick maker?
Butcher: Yeah
Baker: Nope
Butcher: bummer
Baker: Yeah, he's always late
Reflections on a rainy day:
There's just something authentic about tiny droplets of rain rolling down your back. The bit of rain that falls off your umbrella or the brim of your hat. It serves you by cooling you off in the summer and by reminding you of the springtime in the late months of winter. Thanks rain - from our farmers, our gardeners and all of the children who remind us that playing in God's moisture keeps us content despite the GOP's commandeering our civil rights.
Thank you rain...

This is where I'd post some art that friends of mine have made...but this won't let me post any more pics for some reason - I think it's some sort of social injustice - I'm just not sure which "MAN" is trying to keep me down this time - I'll keep you in the loop...


Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Miles and Miles

Miles Davis was inducted into the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame?

Isn't he a jazz guy? Is there a jazz hall of fame - I'm guessing they're (whoever they are) above self congratulatory awards shows. Seems funny that the Rock Hall would claim him as one of their own. It'd be like the Grammy's giving an award to Oprah.
"We just love her show!"

"Um...yeah...but she doesn't really do the music thing"

"oh..well, didn't she sing her theme song"

"sort of...we sort of cleaned it up...and it's not on an album or anything"

"that's good enough for us"

I guess the Rock 'n Roll Hall of Fame just wanted Miles because he's cool. They're like the people who keep a collection of jazz on their shelf so they can play it whenever other people are over - otherwise, they're living la vida loca. There's a reason that Britney Spears outsells Miles Davis 1,000 - 1. People want to like jazz...and want to hate pop. Jazz would be pop if anybody bought it...but then it wouldn't be cool to play at clubs where people smoke cigarettes (is that still legal) and wear goatees and black turtlenecks.

And how did the Sex Pistols get inducted? They released one more album in their career than I did. Remember how big Hanson's first album was? Hootie and the Blowfish? If they would have quit after one year...would they be inducted 40 years from now?

That's like putting the rookie of the year into the Hall of fame because you know the rest of his career would have been awesome if he hadn't quit.

What do I know? I still listen to Joe Cocker.

Monday, March 13, 2006

NCAA tourney

I have UCon beating Duke...kind of boring, but I've watched zero games this year.
If you want in our pool... I'm guessing you fear my mighty picks.
Yahoo! Sports Yahoo! Sports Tournament Pick'em.
In order to join the group, just go to the and click on the "Sign Up" button to create a team. After completing registration, or if you already have a team, click the "Create or Join Group" button and follow the path to join an existing private group. Then, when prompted, enter the following information...
Group ID#: 63687 Password: saget

This doesn't cost anything - this is just good old fashioned gambling without the nuisance of having to carry around a lot of money if you're lucky enough to win this thing.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

a haiku
embracing his mess
the Zig Ziegler of your time
Happy Birthday Steve

Friday, March 10, 2006

The Perfect Movie

My perfect movie would have no car chases.

It would be character driven.

There would be a laugh every 8 minutes.

Wilford Brimley would be in the background of a scene that takes place in a diner...eating oatmeal.

There would be a staged debate between Jeff Goldblum and Oliver Platt - and it would be won by Jeff (obviously)

There would be one slow motion scene where gangsta rap was playing in the background as two schoolchildren were playing connect four.

At random moments Ruth Buzzi would enter and exit a scene without saying a word.

Eventually a group of ballet dancers discover that they kind of look silly in those outfits.

A boy named Sue would be playing in the background of the bar scene (you know, the one where a guy goes to break a pool cue over someone's back - but then realizes that there isn't a pool table nearby - takes a moment to reflect on his violent past, where it's taken him and eventually decides to buy the guy a beer. The beer is refused and the offer is immediately rescinded...followed by a Jim Kirk double axe handle to the gullet)

At some point the main character (I'm thinking a young Jim Backus) breaks the fourth wall and talks to the audience about something that has no bearing on the rest of the movie (he starts talking about his nephew Stan who never calls his mom...and why not? He's a cell phone salesman...if anyone can afford to call his mom - it's Stan)

Led Zeppelin performs to boo's and shouts of "Overrated!"

The movie peaks when a group of high school drop outs get together to put on a reunion. They call it the "Class of ?" reunion.

Turns out that it's kind of fun. They don't have old graduation pictures to compare themselves nobody feels extra fat, bald or old... They don't have old football stories to bore each other with. They only have what's currently happening in their lives to talk about...they actually live in the moment!

It's so much fun that they decide to get together every 10 years from then on!!

It never happens...they're a bunch of slackers who don't follow up on their promises.

and fade to black...
credit roll...

The credits include hilarious outtakes from Saving Private Ryan...

International man of mystery

A few days ago I put a counter on the bottom of the blog that tells me where people are - that are reading the blog.

It's not quite big brother - it just tells me what Country they're in. I wanted to see how long it would take to get someone from Canada to log on...or whatever Country I could get.

Turns out a few hours. In two days I've got six flags (not the amusement park) the flags represent what Country someone is in. So someone in Germany, Canada, Switzerland, the Philippines, the UK (no doubt plotting how to further oppress my people), India and the good U.S. of A! (I guess that's actually 7 - but it's more fun to say that I have 6 flags)

That's kind of crazy.

I'm trying to figure out how they would stumble on this little ol' blog. I'm guessing it's my many references to Bob Saget and his international appeal.

old school

I heard today that Gregorian chants are coming back. So is responsive reading, symbols, and hymns.
I'm just not there. It's ironic that I don't like a lot of the symbols of what I've mistakenly called "dead church". I use these things as symbols of what I never really liked. I sat through a few dozen services where people didn't really seem engaged in what was happening, short services were celebrated, and it was painfully obvious that people were just checking the church box. The thing is...people do the same thing at church's with great music, engaging sermons, relevant topics and cool atmosphere. If they're connected to the body of the believers...then they engage in what's happening....if not...then they're probably just checking a box. Who knows?
Singing new songs with a coffee in your hand and a pair of jeans on your legs can be just as tedious as mouthing back some line from a responsive prayer. It just looks a little more hip/cool/relevant...
I do know that I sat in an hour long meeting today talking about a radio commercial for a church. I've also been in a few meetings where we spent a lot of time discussing the signage. I'm convinced that signs, commercials and ad's aren't really the answer. Relationships seems like where it's at. I understand the need for signs. I get that it helps. I know that if you're going to have might as well make them great signs. They're sort of like sending out e-mails. I hate e-mails because they're just a superficial way to communicate. I also send them daily. I don't like signs - because it's 1000 times more effective to get people talking...but I also make them.

I guess signs and e-mails are only bad if they totally replace human interaction. If we only send out e-mails and put up signs...and then wonder why people aren't showing up at our meetings...then I'd say that we don't get it. They're to help supplement - but shouldn't be the primary means of communication. That's all I'm saying. Church can be bad if you're just checking the box and there are no real relationships being developed...and signs can be bad if they replace our best advertising...word of mouth.

Of course blogs are the greatest thing's how I talk to a bunch of people without actually having to talk to a bunch of people...

Thursday, March 09, 2006


When someone says, "like I said before..."
or it's slightly less offensive brother, "like I said..."
what I hear is, "just listen! How many times do I have to say this before you'll catch on?!?!?"

"Again" is another one. I'm talking to someone in the hall...talking about a concert they went to...I ask a question and they said, "again..."

drives me nuts

I know what you said! I'm asking a deeper that probes into a slightly different perspective than the one you just gave me....JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION AND STOP TALKING DOWN TO ME!!!!

I need to find my happy place (I think it's upstate somewhere)


The snowball effect. It's nice when you're on the good side of the snowball. When you're eating right, because that's just what you do. When you spend time taking care of other's needs...because that's who you are. You exercise because you know you'll feel better later in the day if you run until you pass out now.

Right now I have to stop 3 or 4 times for rest breaks when I walk up a flight of steps. I ask people to help me when I see a "push" sign on a door. If I get a double issue of a magazine, I'll ask the mailman to help me carry it to the door. You get the point...I'm on the bad side of the snow ball.

It's hard to get in the habit of reading more and watching tv less. Stopping the snowball that's headed the wrong way and starting to form and push the good snowball...that's where I need to be right now.

I think it's time to start pushing this thing...

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

life's tough

Everybody wants to be known as a servant...
....nobody wants to be treated like one
(discuss among yourselves)

I want to be known as a man of's just that sometimes, that's really inconvenient

I want to be known as someone who protects the reputation of others - but people really do dumb stuff

I want to be known as someone who loves everybody...even my "enemies" - I'd just rather watch my enemies fail most of the time.

I want so much - I act on it so little

I need grace like nobodies business

too bad I don't give it out...

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

these are just fun to make...and I love these people (double click to enlarge)

safety second

It occurred to me today that I have no idea where the closest hospital is. I could walk to the hospital in State College...but here, I'd have to break out the yellow pages (do we even have the yellow pages?) and then call around, get directions, and then try to not get lost. So in case of emergency...I'm going to be in trouble. "Daddy, I fell out of the tree and landed on my elbow, snapping it into 17 pieces...can you take me to the hospital?" "Um, sure...let me just go and find that phone book...have you seen it?

Maybe I'll just go online. Do you know where daddy's laptop is?"

"Daddy, I'm feeling a little light headed"

I took cpr with a group of coaches once. The guy running the class handed one of the coaches a video and asked him to pass it around. He then said, "OK, you've all just seen the video, let's take the test" He then proceeded to give us all the answers to the test. Honestly, we never were at a practice or game without some sort of medical it wasn't that big of a deal.

I decided to find the nearest hospital today....and I still don't know cpr (15 and 1?) but I'm taking steps. Sometimes planning ahead isn't such a bad thing.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Just here to fix things

Everybody complains about how long the Academy Awards are....

Here's my solution:

Best Actor
Best Actress
Best Supporting Actor
Best Supporting Actress
Best Movie

15 minutes...and you could show it during halftime of the Super Bowl

everybody wins

Sunday, March 05, 2006


I don't have much to say about the Academy Awards. I know that real artists don't really enjoy turning their art into some sort of competition...but I'm no I will say that I really liked Crash. Thought it was interesting story telling...solid acting...good movie. I was a little confused by Matt Dillon's nomination though. I didn't see any of the other movies because we see about one movie every 2 or 3 months and those are often cartoons.

My awards would look something like this:

Murph's Best Picture of all time goes to...Schindler's List. I had just worked 11 hours, my brother picked me up with special preview tickets to a Steven Spielburg movie...that's all I knew. I was crazy tired. In the car he mentioned that the movie was over three hours. Then he said that it was a black and white. I begged him to turn the car around...but it held my attention for three hours....and was incredible. That's gotta be the best picture.

Best song of all time goes to...The Duke of Earl. You hear it once and it's in your head for the next a good way.

Best tv show about surgeons serving during the Korean war - M*A*S*H

Best movie that was based on a tv show - Mission Impossible 2 (I guess that's not saying much though)

Best Rocky - Rocky

Most entertaining Rocky - Rocky III

Best fight in a Rocky movie - Rocky II

Worst movie ever - Rocky V

Best Woody Allen movie - Annie Hall

Worst movie with my wife's name in it - Annie

I kept hearing about ground breaking movies and why movies that maybe are predictable, used a tried and true formula...but have a gimmick, are applauded. Here's my idea:

A romantic comedy where two people start out as friends. The guy secretly (at least to the girl) likes the girl...but she just loves being his friend....or does she? She has a boyfriend and he doesn't treat her that well. You can just tell that they're not made for each other. She starts to realize that she's really in love with her friend and breaks it off....only to find out that he's now dating the girl she kept insisting he ask out!
She gets jealous. They fight. One night he's out with his new girlfriend, she mentions a book that she thought was overrated...he thinks of the other girl....apologizes and breaks it off with her, "It's not you...I just realized that I've made the biggest mistake of my life"
she understands - that way he's not a bad guy.
He rushes out to find a train station...."All aboard" He sprints after the train! He's missed it!
Or did he?

But it turns out that she couldn't get on the train! She's right behind him. They embrace. They share their first kiss! They hear, "all aboard" and they share a laugh together. And then she punches him in the face and says, "I think you have some explaining to do!"
...and he just smiles knowingly as they fade to credits...

Friday, March 03, 2006

large 10

I'm going to a wrestling tournament this weekend. It's 11 teams battling out to win the Big 10.
I wonder who the small team is?
I'm thinking it's Michigan...

It's a pretty brutal tournament. There's a guy who has been the national runner up for two years in a row...easy bet to win the big 10 tournament, right? Or at least to get second...
turns out he's the #4 seed. He was second in the nation...and now he's not even supposed to get second in a league tournament. That's a pretty stacked tournament.

I've seen guys that DOMINATED the state tournament in High School go off to college and just get thrown all over the mat. These guys were awesome, but compared to the best college wrestlers in the nation...they are often average at best. I've seen two and three time NCAA champions not even place in the top five in the Olympic trials - the TRIALS...not the Olympics. This is just a wrestle off to make the team. I've seen a 10 time National champ not even place at the Olympics. It just gets better and better.

The #1 answer to the question: "How does someone get to Heaven" is always - Be a good person. So my question is - How Good is good?

The best person in your high school?
Better than your neighbors? Better than a single mom in Africa that is raising her children on 75 cents a day? Better than the guy that works 40+ hours a week and then volunteers at the orphanage? Better than the folks that have given up big money to go work at soup kitchens?

Is it more of an equation? I've done this many bad things...thought this many bad thoughts...said this many bad things....not done these good things I should have done....
OK, now I'll add those up.....and then I'll add up all the good things I've said, thought, done...and now I'll see which column is bigger?

Better than Hitler? Is that the standard? Or is it better than Mother Theresa?

Compared to a perfect, Holy God...I'm guessing we're like the 3rd grade wrestler that just tries to go out and jump on the other guy...and then tries to enter the Olympics. We think we're pretty good because we can beat most of the other third graders. I wonder how laughable that must be to God. I can almost hear him, "Yeah, they really think I'm going to let them in because they're so 'good', that's probably going to happen" (do you think He's sarcastic?)

Maybe just being good doesn't quite do it.....just maybe.

Thank God (literally) He loves us...

Thursday, March 02, 2006

How lonely would the Lone Ranger have been without Tonto?

I think I need a trusty sidekick.

Before you yell at me about Annie - I should point out a few things...

1. Annie and I are one - thus disqualifying her for sidekick status.

2. She's a girl, and I need a guy sidekick...that's just how these things work.

3. She's pregnant, do you really want to put her in harm's way? And who has ever heard of a pregnant sidekick?

4. She's lousy with grappling hooks.

So back to the trusty sidekick.
I think there are a few things I'm looking for...

1. Grappling hook skills.

2. Not addicted to crack.

3. They have to be funny...not in your face, over the top, a hundred jokes an hour funny....more like wry, witty, subtle, good for a one liner or an interesting story kind of funny.

4. They have to be open to wearing a cape and a mask...but they probably won't have to. I just want someone who's willing to look awesome.

5. We'll need to take rest breaks every fifteen minutes or so.

6. There will be no fighting of crime - I don't want to be seen as judgmental.

7. Mostly, I'm thinking that my sidekick would help me around the house...lawncare, painting, minor repairs, that sort of thing.

Anyone interested?

Being and Doing

I'm stuck on something Randy Bohlender said in a video.

He talked about the difference between doing something and being someone. If we DO stuff....eventually that can get old. If we become someone....we'll naturally do some-thing.
If we do ministry...that'll get old.
If we become people who minister to other's's fits.
If we do "the dad thing" or "the friend thing" or say "the sarcastic thing" - it's more mechanical, less natural and can get dry or old.
If my identity is rooted in being a daddy, who is a friend that's just works.

I'm not sure, but I think there's a lightbulb over my head right now...

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

I just read this...

"a commercial for the Super Bowl cost companies 3-4 million dollars, and people are dying of starvation, malnutrition and poverty...and no one cares!"

My guess is that a company wants people to buy their products...a lot of people watch the Super's expensive to get a commercial because...well...a lot of people watch the Super Bowl. If a company wants a lot of people to buy their product...and they think an ad in the Super Bowl is the way to do it....they should probably pay for a commercial during the Super Bowl....even if it costs millions.

And then they'll make a lot of money. And if they make more money selling stuff than they do on buying supplies, paying people to put those supplies together, paying taxes, paying for unemployment and insurance, paying their rent, and paying for the 4 million dollar Super Bowl commercial....then maybe they can try and help people who are starving.

If they take that money that is going to the Super Bowl commercial...and instead, give it to starving people...then nobody will see their ad...nobody will buy their product...they'll have to close down factories and fire people....and then they've just created more poor people.

I sometimes want to ask the people who are crying out at the injustice - "what have you done to make the situation better"? (assuming that crying out doesn't fix every problem)
sponsor a child?
volunteer at a homeless shelter or soup kitchen?

How about someone who works 40 hours a week, sleeps for 56 and still has 72 hours left many of those hours are spent watching tv? How about helping others?

It's quite possible that there are those who are rich in time...and they (we) might be just as guilty of ignoring the problems of this world...

just maybe...


So I'm walking up to the stage yesterday as Simon, the control freak who only wants people to do what he says....when I notice a lady in a wheelchair.

Ordinarily, that doesn't really cause me to stop and think. The problem is, in Simon Says - you have to have a couple of sure fire outs. I was going to start with, "Hey, we're going to play Simon Says - so everyone stand up" It's a quick way to get started, 3/4's of the room is out before you start, it's kind of funny...and then you start over.

So what do you do if that's your first out?
Also, when you're out in Simon Says, you have to sit down. I ended up saying, "stand up...or scoot your chair back to let us know you're playing"

I never really empathize with people very well. I spend very little time thinking about how it must be for a blind person to find something fun to do on a Saturday night with their friends. For about ten years, it seems like the only things you can do for fun are go to a movie or go bowling. I'm guessing that movies aren't so bad if you're blind, and I've actually gone bowling with a blind guy...but still. I don't think about wheelchair access, wide aisles, elevators or how someone who can't stand up is going to play Simon Says. I guess I don't because I don't have to live in a wheelchair. I'm like that with most things. If it's something that affects me, I'm ready to go to war fighting for a change....otherwise, I just don't think about it.

I used to think about all the celebrities that work for charities because they're afflicted with the particular disease or someone in their family is...and think, "You wouldn't care about this at all if you didn't have a mom with Lupus" I guess I'm just like them. I spend very little time putting myself in someone else's shoes.

or wheelchair...