Tuesday, October 14, 2008

New Days Resolutions

New Year's Resolutions are so 1996.  Everyone has said, "I'll start _______ on Monday" - how lame is that?  Sure, you could start a new plan in November...but really?

I'm making new day's resolutions today.

On Tuesday, October the 14th 2008 I resolve to make some resolutions.

I plan on using the word pandemic.

I'd like to have thai food.

I think today I'll have a couple of sticks of chewing gum and blow a bubble at an inappropriate time.

I'll crank up the air conditioning while driving with my windows down and scream, "I've always hated polar bears anyways!"

I'll fight apartheid and wrestle with voter fraud.

I'll call today, "Super Tuesday" and throw confetti on people taking coffee breaks.

I might just do a jig and tell people I'm embraccing my inner Mickey Rooney.

I'll tell a fake story about stick fighting Steve in Thailand and end it with, "I guess you had to be there"

I'm going to mime, mime, mime!


  1. Sean...I'd like to see a tally at the end of the day to see how many of these you actually did. Otherwise, they're no different than New Years resolutions. I'm gonna guess you could do 6 of your 8 resolutions. More power to ya!

  2. Sticks of chewing gum can be powerful, ... from what I hear. Congratulations.