bowl of deliciousness

You hear, “he married up” all the time. You never hear, “she married up”. Why is that?

I get that it’s a funny little line – or at least it was once…and now it’s just something people say. You’re complimenting her while taking a little lighthearted jab at him.

Having said that, I have a friend that really did marry up. I’m not just saying it – it’s a scientific fact. (and I'm definitely aware of how much I married up - believe you me - but back to my friend)

If he were freshman baseball, she’d be pitching in the World Series. She’s just out of his league.

She’s Rocky and he’s Rocky V. He’s Big K cola and she’s a Diet Cherry Coke at Frisch’s. He’s sledding down the hill in my neighbor’s backyard while she’s skiing Everest. He’s Saved by the Bell the college years and she’s Seinfeld. He’s a sandwich with lettuce and she’s a sandwich with bacon. There’s just no comparison.

And here’s why:
It’s the soup.

Life changing soup. Mouth watering soup. Soup that even a soup hater would love.

She makes the soup nazi look like the soup meter maid. Rachel Ray tasted this soup and slapped Oprah. Nicole Ritchie tasted this soup and asked for a second spoonful.

He’s telling me that she makes more than one soup this delicious. LIES! IMPOSSIBLE! The ravings of a lunatic gone mad. I won't believe it. A world with two such perfect soups? Silly, I know...

So I’ll end with a haiku

cheesy potato
so delicious this soup
rib sticking goodness

I am forever changed...

heart and soul

http://www.tacklingtheelephant.com/

Wal-Mart Bakery, how can I help you?

Yes, I'd like a cake that says, "Best Wishes Suzanne" and underneath that, "We will miss you"

headed to the thumb (I think?)

I'm headed to Michigan today (somewhere near the thumb). Woody Hayes refused to spend money whenever he was in Michigan. He'd rather run out of gas and push his car to the State line than spend money on gas in "the state up North" - he wouldn't even say it's name.

He was a grown man and he refused to say the name of the school rival's state.

I knew a guy who played for Woody. He got a full scholarship and never got on the field. A lot of coaches would get rid of players or take away the scholarships of players who obviously weren't good enough to play for them. Woody found out this guy's father died and drove over to his house to give him his car keys. So he drove Woody Hayes' car home for the weekend to be with his family and go to the funeral. I'm guessing that's now against NCAA rules - and I'm guessing 'ol Woody wouldn't much care.

The OSU team doctor was Doctor Murphy. The funny thing about Doc Murphy was he looked exactly like my grandfather - who coincidentally had the same last name...which led to the occasional interesting/confusing conversation. Well Doctor Murphy knew a few things about Woody that most people didn't know. One big one was that Woody was a diabetic. In fact, Dr. Murphy noticed that Woody was way "off" during one game and desperately needed a shot - but instead he went out on the field and punched a player. He was out of control. He was chemically out of control. And then Woody was fired/retired.

Woody was one of the few full professors to ever coach a major college football program. He was the only one to coach a team in four consecutive Rose Bowls.

He was a great man. He punched people.

That's just kind of how most people are - we have some great stuff & we have some junk. We've decided to love some people despite the fact that they punch people, and not love some people, despite the fact that they go without a car for three days so that kids can go home and visit their families during a dark period of their life.

We all decide to love some people despite their flaws. We actively choose to love some people. That's the interesting thing about Jesus - He actually mentions this. He said that even the really bad people love some people - but He called us to more than that. We're not just to love the lovable people in our lives - we're even supposed to love the unlovable. We're to love even our enemies.

So this weekend I'm headed to Michigan...

Clearly they're not my enemy, in fact there are people living there that I think are awesome - I'm just saying....8 days 'til the Michigan game.

robots taking over the phone world

You ever wonder why an answering machine would say, “You have reached 513-911-0288, we’re not home right now so just leave us a message”?

That never really helps me. I know the number I’ve reached because I just called it. If I wasn’t sure, I could just hit redial.

I’m also not a fan of the robot answering machines. I always end up leaving a half hearted message, the whole time wondering if I have the wrong number for this person.

How about this one – the phone rings five times, there’s a fifteen second message – then a robot comes on and tells you to hit a button to page the person – hit another button to hang up – hit a third option if you’d like to leave a message – and the whole time you’re just waiting for the beep.

The beep is all we’re really waiting for.

A decent message might be, “it’s me – Sean – BEEP”

I think people would figure that out. Maybe I’ll go re-record my messages.

moving on

Black and white photos look better than color photos. That's just science. You can't argue with the good people at NASA. Having said that, I've been thinking about our technical "advances" and wondering why we seem to move backwards in so many areas.

The text message. If we had a way of communicating through a small device that we typed through a series of repeatedly tapping pads on a tiny keyboard with your thumb until the letter you desire pops up – often tapping the same pad three times before your desired letter appears. You’d be typing with your thumbs and just dream of the day where some day this process would be sound activated. Just imagine the day when you could just talk into the devise and have the words appear! Even better – what if you could talk into that devise, and someone on the other end could actually hear your words!?!? It would be a glorious day indeed!

The electric can opener is one I can’t figure out. I pull a tiny device out of my cabinet and spin it three or four times to open up the can. OR I can take a much larger device out of a cabinet, plug it into the wall, and then attach and hit the button to basically perform the same action. I’m just not sure that’s better.

This season of The Office. I was talking with some friends about how disappointing this season has been, but it took a much sharper friend of mine to point out some of the subtleties of this last episode that I had missed.

Maybe The Office is actually evolving? Maybe I'm just not quite up to speed yet. Maybe this is actually the greatest show of all time - supplanting Ed and Seinfeld?

kicking it in the Dub C

I can sleep at night once more!!! The guy who was driving around shooting at houses in and around my neighborhood has been caught. It is once again safe in the Dub C.

According to the story on channel 12, there was no known motive.

Disgruntled Bengals fan? We may never know…

the ultimate

Football is the ultimate team sport.

Here is why I say that. If you were to put a great player, even a Hall of Famer, on a bad team - they'll be mediocre at best. I shouldn't say that. I should say that if you take a great player and put him on a team with a bad system for him...he'll be mediocre at best.

There have always been great players on bad teams. You could make an argument that they played on bad teams that also had a good system for them. Maybe their offense was horrible, but they had a good defensive system that still allowed that linebacker to shine. Maybe their defensive was so bad that you were on the field longer than you should have been....so you ended up with more tackles.

Charlie Weis was the genius offensive coordinator for the Patriots. Then he was the genius head coach of Notre Dame. Then he was the worst coach in the history of football. If you take a look at the Patriots offense now - they're not so bad, even without Charlie. A bad coach looks like a great coach when he has the right players - or the right coaching staff.

Steve Young threw 11 touchdowns and 24 interceptions when he played for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. He was awful. He went to San Francisco and was a Hall of Fame Quarterback. He was playing in a system where a guy with a mediocre arm and the greatest wide receiver of all time helped make Hall of Fame careers out of quarterbacks.

Mike Vrabel was a backup for the Steelers. He's was one layer removed from the practice squad because he was behind a Pro Bowl linebacker. He was a great linebacker playing in the wrong system on the wrong team.

David Klingler was the 6th pick in the 1992 draft. He was in everyone's top ten that year. Experts across the land said so. He wasn't a sure thing, because there is no such thing in the NFL - but he was considered a legitimate #1 pick by many. He was awful. I'd argue that if you put Joe Montana on that team - he would have been nearly as bad. So either he set all those records in college because he was a pretty good player playing in a great system, or he was thrown out of the league because he was a pretty good player playing in an awful system.

The Bengals were awful. Their coaches were awful. So every year they would get the #1 pick in the draft. Each year they'd get another player and fire another coach. Eventually they improved enough to pull to .500. What you'd want to be is the coach that came along when they were starting to get better just by resting every single postseason and then getting the top draft picks. Along comes Marvin - he, of the one winning season in 5 years.

Put Marvin on the right team with the right personnel and the right system, I'll bet he'd be a pretty good defensive co-ordinator.

Great players playing in the right system under the right coach make for a great team. It's the ultimate team sport.

Tackling the elephant

the holidays

So the kids went Trick or Treating. Lots of treats and not one trick.

At one point I saw a father and his son and thought it was kind of nice that the dad dressed up in a costume to go out with his son. As they came a little closer I realized that they were both kids, it's just that one of the kids asking for candy was a 200 pound 17 year old.

Cooper and Parker went as monsters. The great thing about their costumes was that they were basically fur jumpsuits. They were covered from head to toe in warm rug-like blue and green "fur". There's nothing worse than covering your sweet Power Rangers costume with a big floppy winter coat. You go door to door feeling like a flasher - you have to expose what's under your coat to get your M & M's. That's no good.

If you want to save a couple of dollars next Halloween - just stick a bowl on your front porch with a sign that says, "Please take one!" Every time you see those bowls they're already empty anyway...just a thought.